For as long as I can remember, writing has been a part of who I am. From the Young Author's stories I wrote as an Elementary and Middle School Student, to the deep and meaningful poetry that I wrote as an angsty teenager, writing has been an outlet for me to escape into a world that feels far removed from reality. So now, as a 30-something adult, with more responsibilities than I can even count, I decided that I needed to find that outlet again to just keep my own sanity. Anybody else feeling this way lately? No, just me???
I decided to consult my family when I was deciding on a name for this blog. My brain seems to be less and less of a well-oiled machine lately and more of a decomposing compost bin full of yesterday's old trash. See why the outlet feels more and more like a necessity?
My oldest, who we will just call teenager for now, immediately spat out our youngest's favorite phrase right now. And it felt so fitting. But a blog title that is just known as "Love You So Much" felt as though it was lacking something. So my family also suggested adding the "and Other Stuff". Voila. It was a few minute-long process that resulted in the eventual name for this blog. Mind you, I had been brainstorming ideas and possible names for weeks. Leave it to them to help me solve my problem in mere minutes.
I can always count on my family for finding ways of showing me a reality that I cannot see on my own. The five of us, we are all so different, and yet so alike, in so many ways. Our different views and perspectives make for some interesting and sometimes heated discussions on everyday topics. Given the current Pandemic and all that involves, the conversations have been bittersweet as of late. It has me longing for the days of less dramatics and more fun. But these serious discussions, revelations, and open-ended conversations have shown me more about myself and those closest to me than I would ever have imagined.
A short two years ago, our family that had become so comfortable with the number 4, was blessed with a fifth member. The crazy toddler, as we all now refer to her, has brought more joy and happiness into these 4 lives than we can even handle. She was definitely the missing link to our chain and the best little red-headed, firecracker of a surprise this side of the Mississippi! Since then, our lives have changed quite a bit, but the bonds that our family had have grown tighter and stronger.
Many years ago, I started a different blog about my middle child, my other red-head. Our son was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder at the age of 2, and that blog centered around life as a mommy of a child who has ASD. The first few years with him were hard. I shed more tears in those few years than I have the rest of my entire life. He was physical, non-verbal, and full of anger. I'm not going to sugar coat any of it. It was hard. I spent hours squeezing his little body while he hit and kicked and bit me all to protect everyone else. Parenting that child for those years was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. Period.
I intend for this blog to become a daily conversation with myself. You can join in too if you like! But I realize that the more confusion I feel, and as the stress that accompanies that continues to grow, it's now more than ever that I need to do this. Mostly for myself, but also for you, my readers, so that you may know that you are not alone in this crazy world of adulting, and learning, and parenting if that might be the case. I invite you to take this journey with me. I implore you to find something that allows you your own outlet. And I insist that you have dance parties in your kitchen at least once a day!
Enjoy your day.
Love you so much!
-jennifer
love you so much! - teenager
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